In my recent article 504 Plans and IEPs: Helping Your Child Get the Support They Need, Jodi walked through the what - what these plans are, how they differ, and how to navigate the process as a parent. I want to build on that with something equally important:
What schools are actually required to do when it comes to ADHD.
Because this is where I see the biggest gap – not just in understanding ADHD, but in understanding the law.
There is a document that every parent should know about:
U.S. Department of Education – Dear Colleague Letter on ADHD (July 26, 2016)
https://www.ed.gov/media/document/dear-colleague-letter-and-resource-guide-students-adhd-2016-35074.pdf
This letter was written to clarify schools’ responsibilities under Section 504.
And it directly addresses many of the misconceptions parents run into.
The Most Important Takeaways (in plain language)
1. Schools must evaluate when ADHD is suspected
Schools are required to evaluate a student if there is reason to suspect a disability.
That means:
- You do not need a failing child
- You do not need a crisis
- You do not need to “wait and see”
If your child is struggling, that is enough to start the process.
2. Good grades do not disqualify a child
This is one of the biggest misunderstandings I see.
A child can be:
- Bright
- Performing at grade level
- Even doing “well enough”
…and still qualify for support.
Because the question is not:
“Are they passing?”
The question is:
“How hard is it for them to function?”
3. ADHD impacts more than academics
The law is clear that schools must consider major life activities like:
- Concentrating
- Thinking
- Regulating behavior
- Managing tasks
- Communicating
This is Executive Function.
So when a child:
- melts down
- avoids work
- can’t get started
- loses track of time
- struggles with transitions
That matters.
4. Schools must look at functional impact, not just performance
This is where many conversations go sideways.
A child might:
- finish the work
- get the answers right
- keep up academically
But if they are:
- exhausted
- dysregulated
- needing constant adult support
- falling apart at home
That is not the same as “fine.”
One important piece many parents don’t realize
The guidance in this letter applies to public schools.
These protections are built into the public education system and are part of what ensures students with ADHD are identified, evaluated, and supported.
Private schools may absolutely offer support – and many do – but they are not held to these same legal requirements in the same way.
This isn’t about one setting being “better” than another.
But it is important to understand what support is guaranteed, and what is not, so you can advocate effectively and make informed decisions for your child.
What this means for younger children
For younger kids (like many of the families I work with), schools often say:
- “They’re young”
- “This is developmental”
- “Let’s wait”
And sometimes that’s appropriate.
But often, what’s really happening is this:
The child is already showing a mismatch between what is expected and what they can manage.
At age 5, 6, 7… that shows up as:
- difficulty with transitions
- impulsivity
- emotional outbursts
- trouble following routines
- needing far more support than peers
The law still applies.
The question becomes:
Is your child accessing the classroom in the same way as other students?
Where this connects back to Jodi’s article
Jodi did a beautiful job explaining the difference between a 504 Plan and an IEP.
But here’s the piece I always want parents to hold onto:
The plan itself is not the goal.
The goal is:
- understanding how your child’s brain works
- identifying where they are struggling
- putting supports in place that actually help
Because, as she said so clearly:
A plan only works if the adults understand what they are supporting.
Schools are not intentionally withholding support
Most of the time, they simply:
- don’t fully understand ADHD
- rely on outdated assumptions
- look at performance instead of process
Which is why parents so often hear:
- “They’re doing fine”
- “Let’s wait”
- “They’ll grow out of it”
This letter exists to correct that.
If you take one thing from this
You don’t need to prove your child is failing.
You need to be able to say:
“My child is struggling to manage the demands of the school day, and I want us to look at what supports would help.”
That’s the conversation.
And when that conversation is grounded in understanding — not just paperwork — everything starts to shift.
If you want help knowing what to say (and how to say it)
This is exactly the kind of situation we work through in Calm and Connected: Parenting Children and Teens with ADHD/Executive Function Challenges and in our one-on-one support for parents.
We don’t just talk about what your child needs –
we help you understand:
- what’s actually driving the behavior
- how to respond in the moment
- how to advocate with clarity and confidence
- and how to work with schools in a way that leads to real change
If you’re feeling unsure of what to say or how to move forward with your child’s school, you don’t have to figure that out on your own.
You can learn more here:
https://ptscoaching.com/parents/
